I had no idea how serious it would really become. When I signed the contract, everything seemed far off and abstract—a significant moment whose consequences I could only truly comprehend bit by bit. But now it’s reality: From this day on, I will wear a collar every single day and every night.
It’s not just an accessory, not just a symbolic detail. I have no key. I can’t simply take it off whenever I want. This fact stirs a question in me that I can’t answer so easily: Do I now belong to someone? Or is it more a decision that brings me closer to myself?
As I sort through these thoughts, I also wonder what I’ve really gotten myself into. The scope of this decision is greater than I first thought. How will my daily life change? How will I change within it? And not least: How will the people around me react? What will friends, acquaintances, or even strangers think when they see me?
My mother encouraged me in this decision. Her words gave me the courage to take this step, even though I don’t yet know exactly where it will lead. But it’s not just about the collar. It’s more than that. I will spend every day in latex. I will stand, walk, and live on my tiptoes in ballet heels.
There’s no going back now. A new reality begins—one that challenges me, fascinates me, and might even transform me.
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